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« Step 1 - How To Manage Your Hot Buttons | Main | Final Step - How To Manage Your Hot Buttons »

February 01, 2006

Step 2 - How To Manage Your Hot Buttons

If you completed step 1 of How To Manage Your Hot Buttons, you should be more aware of:

  1. Which situations tend to push your buttons

  2. The warning signals your body sends you when your buttons are being pushed

  3. How you tend to react in those situations

Now you're more aware. You have consciously gathered some very important information. Before we move on to "what to do with the information", let's look a little closer.

If I asked someone close to you about how you react when your buttons get pushed, I'll bet they could answer in the blink of an eye. It's one of those things that's easy for others to see, but more difficult for us to admit to ourselves. After all, it's usually not something you're going to brag about. And that's my point. As Dr. Phil would say, "How's that working for you?"

That leads us to Step 2. What is it costing you?  By that I mean, take a good close look at the consequences. What damage is being done, and what is the impact?

Let's take Brad as an example. Brad is an IT guy.  Part of his responsibility is to answer the "help line" for one hour every day.  He hates it.  He thinks it's a waste of time.  He thinks the callers ask stupid questions, and he does everything possible to get out of it.  When he finally does take his turn, he makes sure he let's the caller know he thinks they're stupid.  No, he doesn't come out and say it, but they can hear it in his voice.  He's impatient, he sighs, and he makes sarcastic comments.

So what is this behavior costing Brad?  Well, for starters, nobody wants to call in when he's answering the phone.  People go out of their way to find out when he's scheduled so they can avoid him.  I'd say he's created a reputation for treating callers poorly.

Secondly, his team members are tired of his excuses.  They're tired of covering for him and they're tired of his lame reasons for getting out of the responsibility.  I'd say this is also impacting teamwork.

I'm sure there are several other consequences to Brad's behavior, but you get my point.

For the next several days, ask yourself these questions

§           What are my hot buttons costing me?

§           How are they getting in the way of what I want for myself?

§           What changes am I willing to make now?

Let me know how you do!

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